Friday, 31 October 2008

There's a lot of it about

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Spike Milligan was a real funnyman and surely got it right about the future when he wrote this script in 1983 :

Laugh at a cretin; Unemploymethon

'ROUSING, FUN TYPE, MUSIC, AS SIMILAR AS POSSIBLE TO LONDON WEEKEND'S 'GAME FOR A LAUGH'.
PAN ACROSS GLITTERY CAPTION : 'LAUGH AT A CRETIN' WE HEAR A LOUD JOLLY VOICE OVER :

VOICE OVER : Yes, it's 'Laugh at a cretin'. The show where the old, the educationally sub-normal, the poor, the disadvantaged, are laughed at by a load of awful fat woman with false teeth.

BRIEF CUT AWAY TO WEMBLEY CROWD CHEERING.'


Milligan wrote this 7 years after Russell Brand was born.


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14 comments:

zola a social thing said...

As Spike M said ( in real reality time) to his missus across the breakfast table as the doorbell rang.

" would you be kind enough to answer the door my darling?"
Missus went and received a telegram which said :-

" Can you pass the hot milk please?"

Anonymous said...

Fat old women with false teeth can have find many a way to satisfy the likes of Merkin and Zola - especially when they take out those teeth.

anticant said...

Dim memories stir of a vulgar limerick about an old woman of Leith which is too obscene to repeat even here, but which Scots such as Merkin, and maybe also honorary Scots such as Zola, may perhaps recall from their sordid youth.

zola a social thing said...

"too obscene to repeat even here".?
????????
Gimme the limerick.
I will support you if the Merkin tries to ban you.

Merkin said...

As they say Anticant :
'If it's too lewd yer too prude'.

Either that, or you can email me it and I will post it under one of Zola's names!

anticant said...

As it's obvious that neither of you know it, I shall not be the first to sully your innocence [as if I could!]

anticant said...

According to the despicable programme whitewashing Mary Whitehouse and vilifying the BBC's then D-G, Sir Hugh Greene, Sir Hugh at breakfast commanded his wife to "pass the fucking butter".

When I pointed out to the current worm occupying that exalted [?] post that it was most unlikely his predecessor would have said anything of the sort, he assured me that Sir Hugh's family had been shown the film before it went out and were happy with it.

I now hear, on the best of authority, that Sir Hugh's widow was furious and says that he would NEVER have used such language to her or anyone else.

So much for the veracity of the backpeddling Mr Thompson. I have emailed 'The Times' that he is clearly unfit for his post.

Edward said...

He also wrote it some years before Peter Ballsgazette thought of Big Brooother. I know a rude limerick about a young man from Belgrave. Unfortunately it relies upon an image that Jeremy Clarkson rather ill-advisedly used on Top Gear, so I'd better keep quiet about the rest for fear that Merkin will moderate me.

Merkin said...

Have no fear.
This is a non-moderated site, Edward.

I did remove one troll post about 18 months ago - and even then only because it included backlinks to a questionable site and I feared I was being targeted by a particular political group.

We do collect Limericks here so feel free to send it on the email link.

I can never think of Mary Whitehouse without remembering Anticant's having told me of 'a miniskirt so short he could see her knickers'.

(In fact, I may just put that onto the latest Graun thread!).

anticant said...

Did I say she was wearing knickers?

Merkin said...

Do fill in the details before I post !!!

Merkin said...

As James Bond would say 'did the collar and cuffs match?'

anticant said...

I was too gobsmacked by the cheekiness of the brief miniskirt to notice.

SewerTideBanned said...

'He also wrote it some years before Peter Ballsgazette thought of Big Brooother.'

Zola revisited for obtuse-osity.